I gave life! I gave birth… I made a whole baby, from start to finish and I even pushed him out the appropriate exit!
Sorry for not officially sharing with you guys sooner, technically I did on instagram ;) but you know… I’ve been trying to sleep, eating, feeding.. Feeding.. Managing to shower even! ;)
I still go through periods of “I can’t believe I have two sons!”, but to be fair – I just finally started getting used to the thought that I have a kid..
Mr. Lukas (Luka) has his birthday on December 5th, 10 days before his actual due date. My birthday is on a 5th, so I was secretly deep inside hoping he would be that early, but I knew my chances were slimmer than what my pre-pregnancy waist seemed to me by week 36.
And my poor brother in law… He even Googled vbac because of my instagram hashtag.. :) but at least it wasn’t for nothing ;)
Towards the last weeks, my worries about how am I going to handle 2 kids, and will I be robbing my first one of important momma love a 2-3 year old desperately needs? How will I give them as much attention as I want to?… They started to fade as I began to accept that things will sort themselves out and no point in worrying about it since – can’t do anything about it anyway… For the first time my mind was finally freed up to wonder – what’s this guy going to look like?? How similar and how different is he going to be from his brother? Will he look more like me or like dad?? But I hardly got to dwell on this, since labor tackled me from around the corner.
And now, in these first few weeks, my mind still can’t absorb it! It can’t absorb how cute this little guy is, while at the same time get over the fact that there’s some little foreign person I’ve never seen before all over my boob! Can’t absorb how he’s got a little something of me, a little something of dad and is soooo much like his brother (Omg! Brooother! What the heck! :)) but at the same time – so different! (back to the strange foreign little man in our house)
So bottom line for today is – I couldn’t be happier! I feel like I’ve gone through a very very weird life portal – I’ve got all the things I’ve wanted in life and now I can spend the rest of my time enjoying them :)
Hopefully it’s not just a hormone thing that will turn into the pumpkin of “what the heck did I get myself into!?”
P.S. Don’t worry, birth story with all the deets – coming later! So if you’ve got some specific questions – send em over! ;)